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There are so many things that I need to do but I'm not doing them. Am I being lazy? Somewhat. I'm exhausted. The 46 hours of work this week has been a killer; especially since most of that was spent typing in some way or another. What I am suppose to be doing is bringing every out of my two bedrooms and going through it but I talked with my step-father last night and he agreed that on Tuesday or Wednesday he'll clean out the stuff he has in the dining room and then start bringing down the containers and piles from the rooms and then I can go through them where I actually have room. And so they told me to rest today since I'll probably have another week of overtime.

So what have I done today? Well, I wound up sleeping late since the one cat kept me up most of the night fighting for bed space. Finally got out of bed at 11 and got a shower. A few years ago I had tried the Schick Intuition shower razor and didn't like how it did my legs but yesterday when I was at Giant, they had the Schick Intuition Plus on sale plus I had a $1 off coupon for anything in Health and Beauty so I decided to try it again. This time, it didn't suck. And in the long run, it's cheaper then the Nair Shower stuff that I've been using. That is a definite plus.

After my shower I ordered some boneless wings from Chili's. They said ten to twenty minutes and so I used that time to hit Barnes and Nobles next door to Chili's for my British Genealogy magazines. And guess what - the new Top Gear magazine was also in and it has a bright green Porsche on the front. While I was there, I found they had a new Knit Simple magazine and two history magazines that looked interesting. And I was bad, I hit the Star Bucks in the back of Barnes and Nobles and got a Venti Light Caffe Vanilla. I know, seriously bad but I was craving caffeine. Picked up dinner and I've been sitting here on the couch relaxing and watching family movies free onDemand. First was Cheaper by the Dozen 2 which was really good. Now I just started First Daughter. I don't know how it is going to be but you know what, I don't care. It makes me happy. :)

Mom is staying up at the house in Harrisburg for the week but Steve is on his way down. We didn't get him a birthday present and we know he wanted the Google Nexus phone but we can't get it on a family plan. Not through T-Mobile because the guy mom talked to on the phone tried to help her but said Google is controlling it all. He did help her get in touch with Google who suggested we buy out his part of my family plan and then buy the phone through them on his own plan; or we can spend $530 and buy just the phone and put it on the family plan ourselves. The woman at Google told mom if we're not willing to spend the money with them, then we should look at the new HTC phone but the Google phone out performs the HTC phones. I'm going to take him up to look at it. And I beg to differ with the woman's comment. Steve already has a Google phone and I have the HTC touch pro 2 and my phone is way better then his. So we'll see if he likes the phone but I'm thinking not.

I am thinking of playing The Sims 3 for a bit; or WoW since I haven't played that in a long time either. Of course, I should also work on pen pal letters. What should I do?

Changes

Apr. 24th, 2010 04:08 pm
justagirl: (Default)
The past few weeks, all I've been thinking about is how so many people think my life is bad. And for the life of me, I cannot figure out how my life is bad. Because it's not. If it was random people, I probably wouldn't care so much but my own father thinks there is something wrong with my life. But after much soul searching and a few conversations with my therapist, I've come to realize that my life is not bad. It just isn't what everyone expects it to be.

The biggest thing that everyone; including my father; seems to harp on is the fact that at twenty-seven (almost twenty-eight), I still live at home with my mother, my step-father and my younger brother. Do I want to be here? Part of me says yes, it's nice to have people around in the house and part of me says no, maybe people would want to be my friend if I lived on my own. Sure, I could find roommates but I'm not one to live with random people and I do have a serious shortage of friends right now so the only option I have is to find a place on my own.

I've priced it out and looked at different options and have come to a conclusion. Could I afford to live on my own? Yes. Would I still be able to live like I'm accustom to? For the most part. Would things get tight? More then likely; especially if I have to start re-paying my student loans anytime soon or I have to pay more out of pocket for this next degree I'm working on. At this point, I really do not think it would be wise on my part to move out. Sure, everyone is saying the economy is turning up but the problems are still not over. And my work; while we're getting busy again; could always have more layoffs. If by some awful chance I was to get laid off, I wouldn't be able to afford to live on my own. Besides, in really thinking about it, before I move out, I want to get a new car. Well, actually, before I move out, I'd like to get married but that isn't happening any time soon.

And that is the other thing that everyone is constantly harping at me about. My singleness and the fact that I really haven't dated since high school. Truth be told, I'm not a casual person. Well, except for clothes. Random dating is not my thing. The major part of being single that bothers me is I do want to get married and I do want to have kids. And I know that to meet someone, I am going to have to go on dates - but I'm not up for the "let's go to the bar and meet a guy there" that my other single girl friend has been suggesting. I know what I want in a guy and I know there are guys out there that meet what I'm looking for. And yes, one day I will meet them. For the most part, being single doesn't bother me but when everyone gets on me about it, my OCD kicks in and it's the only thing I can think of. Besides, the few guys I have gone on dates with over the past nine years have said after one date that I'm the type of girl a guy marries and they just aren't looking for that yet. Which is a) a bunch of bull because they're just not interested but they're trying to spare my feelings or b) the truth in which I'm basically screwed.

Blah - there are other things that people get on my case about but it all pretty much ties up into the fact that I'm twenty-seven, single and living at home. So I figured it's time to make some changes. While change does tend to scare me, I also tend to jump into it head first and make too many changes at once. I need to stop and start making small changes. Yes, there is a big change going on in that my family has just up and decided to move to Harrisburg. Sure it's the state capital but let me tell you, there is a big difference from living in the suburbs of Philadelphia to living in Harrisburg. I'm not even in the city and there are more people living in my area then live in Harrisburg. Thought this would be cool but I'm beginning to think it's seriously not. We will see but if I have trouble finding friends in Philadelphia, how the hell am I going to find friends in Harrisburg? And now mom has sprung on me that she thinks we'll probably be moving back to the suburbs of Philadelphia in a year or two. So why the hell are we moving then? At this point, I'm not going to quit my job and find something out there if we're probably going to be back here in a year or two.

So what am I changing? Well, I did try to dye my hair blond. Didn't work as the blond just pulled all my natural red highlights and I'm now pretty much a dark strawberry blond. But I have started wearing make-up (I feel so fake with make-up on) and now that I've lost a little weight (I think if I could actually get the flubber of my stomach and gut to tone, it'd actually feel like I've lost weight) and can buy XXL shirts from Old Navy, I'm updating my wardrobe some. I am also focusing on a more positive outlook on life and keep thinking positively about what I want in life. So far while nothing has changed, I am more happy. Happy is good. I am also branching out in the online world and created a journal at dreamwidth. It's time to make some new friends and to continue to grow as a person.

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justagirl

November 2010

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